When I last wrote, it was about a sense of place, those environments that feel our soul. Today, I am feeling a soul-sickness over fires raging in the Columbia River Gorge, changing the landscape that means so much to so many. It struck me that this will be one of those things, one of those defining and memorable moments that we will talk about in the years to come: the Tillamook Burn of 1933, charred remains of the forest still visible when I was a kid 30 years later, the Columbus Day Storm of 1962, “the Flood of ’96,” and now the Gorge fires of 2017.  

What about the defining and memorable moments in our own lives? So often it can feel like I head in to work on Monday morning, blink a few times, and it’s Friday. Much of my daily life is routine, and I’m ok with that. But there are defining moments, those events that stay with us and feel like turning points for better or worse, those stopping points where I say, "Self, pay attention. Notice what you are doing and how you are feeling, because this is important." I think of my father’s death, the amazement I felt climbing inside the pyramids at Giza, all that was involved in getting to treatment...   And then later, graduating with my Master’s Degree, walking on the Great Wall of China, our wedding day, my mother’s passing...  Were I to write out a timeline, there would be much more - jobs, relationships, adventures, heartbreak, marathons, loss. If we are fortunate, the adventures outweigh the valleys, but there are no guarantees.

The fire in the Gorge is not just about trees and displaced animals; it is about lived experience and memory associated with this particular place. So many of us are talking about how much this hurts. These are our forests, our trails, our home. We talk about our personal losses and triumphs with our peers and our therapists,but they are our experiences. Collective experiences invite a coming together to talk about the pain of loss, to wonder how we can help, to remind ourselves to take nothing for granted.

These last few weeks, with hurricanes and raging fires, I am reminded of the power of nature, and I pray that we can protect Mother Earth from ourselves; I am reminded of those other events that have shaped my history (my parent’s relation to the Great Depression, for example); and I think about my own life path that is so hugely important to me at any given moment, but in reality, is just a small piece of the puzzle. I think about the joy and sadness that visits each life, individually and as a group. Powerlessness is sometimes a relief, but sometimes it outright sucks. When life on life's terms seems unfair, it can be harder to practice the Serenity Prayer, but practice I must. Practice, and pray for rain. Practice and reach out to others who are hurting, with gratitude for our recovery programs that move me from isolation to community in both the best and the worst of times.

Where do you go for solace when you are hurting over events in the world? If you were to write a timeline of your life, what would be the high and low points? How have you shared about those with trusted others?