I'm posting a day early this week, as we're heading up to Vancouver, BC for the AA International Convention. I've been to every once since getting sober: Seattle 1990, San Diego 1995, Minneapolis 2000, Toronto 2005, San Antonio 2010 and Atlanta 2015. Like so many of us, I was ready for Detroit in 2020, but the pandemic had other ideas. My husband and I did visit Intergroup there in 2022 and have the t-shirt to prove it!
We hope to see friends in Vancouver that we usually just see on Zoom. I think it was in Minneapolis where one of the long-timers shared that what kept him coming back was "the love-vibe of the people." I relate to the joy I see on fellow attendee's faces as we make our way through various cities over the years, standing in long lines for coffee, holding hands for the Serenity Prayer with 40-60,000 of my peers. Talk about an infusion! I look forward to workshops and speaker meetings, both AA and Alanon, and simply soaking up the positive energy.
I'm at one of those lulls where I'm evaluating my meeting schedule and life in general, as in what is feeding me and what isn't. I can be very habitual, which isn't a bad thing when related to program, but when I start to feel an internal groan about a particular group, whether related to content or even the drive there, I know it's time to perhaps mix it up, or to take a look at my expectations. Am I looking at what I receive, or what I can pack into the stream of life? For me, meetings need to be a bit of both. Conferences can be good in that way - a chance to soak in program (and put principles to work with big crowds) and reignite my passion, ODAT.
So, safe travels to all who'll convene in Vancouver, whether you're coming by plane, train or automobile. Hope to see you there! Hope to see you there, and I do understand that conferences are something of a niche within AA. Some like them, some don't. I'm grateful for the "all inclusive" aspect of our 12-Step programs, as in "take what you like and leave the rest."
A friend recently sent me the huge volume, The Writing of the Big Book." I'm slowly wading my way through, some a bit dry, but some fascinating, especially in the context of there being not much other than lobotomy and the ice bath cure before AA. It is interesting to read that as the book was being written, Bill W. felt that a person needed a spiritual experience in order to get sober, while Hank P. just as firmly believed that it was sobriety and changed behavior that led to a Higher Power. I used to wonder about that - did "god" bring me to AA, or did AA bring me to "god," back when I wanted to put god in a box of a firm definition. I've always loved my friend's definition of "god as I don't understand it." Indeed. If I could understand the powers in the universe, I would need them. I will say that my ideas about a higher power have shifted and changed many times over the years, and today I'm less inclined to worry about the particulars. To me, HP shows up in the warmth of people in meetings, or the smile shared with a fellow walker on my route, the small acts of kindness I see in my own life or read about in the news (I try to steer myself to positive reports rather than the doom and gloom that sells). As I've read in one publication or another, "God is a feeling, not a thing."
Whether you're a conference go-er or not, how do you experience the "love vibe of the people" you meet in AA or in the greater world? How do you re-evaluate when life or program feels a bit stale? How would you describe your higher power today, if you were to describe it at all?
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The NOW WHAT workbook is 78 pages of topics and processing questions, great for solo exploration or in a small group. Go to the WEB VERSION of this blog page for the link on ordering (PDF for those outside the U.S., or hard copy mailed to you). Contact me at SoberLongTime@soberlongtime.com or shadowsandveins@gmail.com with questions. And a reminder that the workbook, is available at the Portland Area Intergroup at 825 NE 20th. for local folks. Note that I will have a supply with me at the Convention in Vancouver, BC this week
