ODAT

 In a meeting this week, someone shared their feelings of overwhelm, given all that's going on in the world at the moment. I get it, and think it would be odd if we, if I, didn't have feelings about the sad state of affairs. What struck me, as I did my best to quiet my racing mind, is that what I hear about on the "news" is what's happening on the edges, the fringes, the loudest voices that get the most attention. From my actual view of my actual life, it seems that most people are simply living - getting the kids to school, shopping for groceries, making dinner, going to the beach. I need to remember that I have a choice on what I ingest. As I re-heard recently, I'm not responsible for my first thought, but I am responsible for my second, as well as where I put my attention. How long am I spending in online news outlets or on TV, or reading stranger's comments on social media?

A friend recently noted the huge differences in the world today, where many (some?) are engaged in intense relationship with people online they'll never meet, or even see their faces. This friend noted a visceral sense of the wheel of time shifting, with our generation no longer relevant to the younger. I very much relate, and it makes me just a bit sad, which I'm sure each generation must feel as time and technology sprints onward.

All of this increases my gratitude for our 12 Step programs - the timeless wisdom and guidance inherent in the principles. I'm not asked to show my Voter Registration card at a meeting, or to sign any kind of loyalty pledge to one faction or another. It is suggested that I practice (emphasis on practice) the ideals of honesty, open-mindedness, willingness, and service.  I'm reminded of a friend from Northern Ireland who was asked to speak at a meeting in what would've been enemy territory during their civil war. He, and his vehicle, were safe while he shared, with the spoken and unspoken rule of our primary purpose. 

I walked 10 miles this morning in preparation for a half marathon in October. I'd realized I was under-prepared, ala resting on my laurels. "Well, I walked the Camino," I've been telling myself, though that was over 4 months ago! Much like program - while I have a strong foundation, my serenity and peace of mind isn't based on what I did 10 years, 10 weeks or even 10 days ago. How am I applying the principles today? 

Along those lines, I met with my AA sponsor this week, reading from the 12x12 and discussing Step 4. My initial reaction was thinking that I don't really need to do inventory. After all, I've been sober a long time and my characteristics (aka character defects) are under control! Ha! Complacency? Self justification?? While I don't think I need to dig for what may or may not be there, I can give myself the time to get still and see what comes up. I don't lie, cheat or steal anymore, but are there ways I'm dishonest with my emotions? Isn't it a form of cheating when I have expectations of how people should behave? Do I steal, or squander time when I spend it worrying about the future?

And so, the beat goes on. I, for one, am very grateful that the season has shifted to autumn - sweater weather, though still warm this week in Portland. Sometimes I complain about the heat, but need to remind myself I'll likely be complaining about the cold and wet in a few months. At least with the weather, I know I'm powerless. I will look to take that same understanding to other areas that may frustrate me - other people's decisions or actions, traffic, neighborhood noise, etc. ODAT

How do you feel about changes in technology and social culture? Are you making peace with the passage of time? Are there areas of self-care or your program where you may be resting on your laurels? How will you re-engage?

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The NOW WHAT workbook is 78 pages of topics and processing questions, great for solo exploration or in a small group. Go to the WEB VERSION of this blog page for the link on ordering (PDF for those outside the U.S., or who prefer it, or hard copy mailed to you). 

Contact me at SoberLongTime@soberlongtime.com or shadowsandveins@gmail.com with questions. A reminder that the workbook is available at Portland Area Intergroup, 825 NE 20th. for local folks. Also, Barth Books and Gifts took a few workbooks back to Yakima, WA with them from Summerfest, if you're in the area