"How it Works" in the Big Book, references "our personal adventures, before and after." My adventures "before" were related to what could I get away with. Any actual adventures were clouded by hangovers and arguments.The adventure back then had to do with intent that was overcome by either inertia or intoxication. I love the scene in the movie "Boogie Nights" where the two girls are sitting on a bed, coked out of their minds, talking about all the things they are going to do - take a class, learn to macrame, get a life. And of course, the next day, with the hideous four horsemen galloping through their brains, all they end up doing is more coke.

Every minute of "after" has been an adventure of sorts, especially at the beginning - daily life was an adventure, both exciting and terrifying, as all grand adventures should be. Making new friends, going to school, getting a job, dancing, for heaven's sake...falling in and out of love, learning to show up and sit still and listen - the discovery of what I was capable of.

Today, life continues to be an exciting experience - both internal and external. A counselor in treatment used to say to us, "You can do anything you want to do, as long as you don't drink or use!" At first I balked at that idea - I couldn't become President, after all - not with my history. Then again, I wouldn't want to become President, of anything. What I want to do is travel and write and run in beautiful places. I want to be a good wife, a good step mom, a good sister, a good friend. I want to grow, and continue to explore the depths of my soul and my commitments.

I'm getting ready to embark on a grand adventure with two of my best buds. I may be out of consistent internet range, so will write again when I get home. In the meantime, I'll be out there in the world, gathering experience, living life.

What are your adventures today? Maybe the adventure of a new love or a new job? Maybe another round through the Steps? What is it that you look forward to?